‘I screamed at my mum for help and to call the police.’

Domestic violence victim shares the horrors of her story and how she faced her abuser and ultimately won.

In 2017 Kelly met a man from Harold Hill unaware of his controlling past and the misery and violence he would bring to her life. Now, in January 2022, after a long court trial the man has been found guilty of assault by beating and harassment with violence and awaits sentencing.

Kelly is an Occupational Therapist and was completely unaware of the man’s past when she first began a relationship with him. She endured threats, violence, controlling behaviour and intimidation from him and his family in a bid to stop her from going to court.

Yet Kelly stood her ground and despite the barrage of abuse, went to court and testified against her former boyfriend.

She told the Havering Daily:

“I never knew of his past. I then had his former girlfriends come forward and speak with me.

“With me it began with the controlling behaviour. He was always looking at my phone, checking it. If I didn’t answer his phone call he would then call my children and my mother.

“Sadly when my father died, he took control of the situation under the guise of helping myself and my family.

“If we broke up, he would sit in my drive way, with his hand on the car horn or say things to me like ‘what you going to do now, your dad’s dead so he can’t help you.”

It was then that the violent behaviour towards Kelly began.

“We had an argument and I waited for him to leave. I don’t have shouting in my house because of my children. However, he didn’t leave and came up to my bedroom. He then placed a knee on my groin and put his hands on my throat.

“He then pushed me down the stairs and I fell against the door, he called my mum telling her I needed £5k and I managed to scream to my mum to call the police and that I needed help. My house alarm had gone off but sadly he knew how to turn it off.”

Luckily Kelly’s mum did call the police and the Harold Hill man left.

From there Kelly stood her ground and despite endless intimidation from the man and his family calling her mad and unstable, she went to court and testified against him, securing a guilty plea.

“It was a terrible experience. He hired a murder defence lawyer who battered me on the stand to the point that the judge had to stop her several times because of the way she hounded me.

“I actually started to believe her, she was that good. I really was treated as a criminal, the man who was in the court with me as witness support, actually told me that he had never seen a witness be hounded as much as I was.”

Despite her ordeal, Kelly stood her ground and the man was found guilty this month by a jury and will be sentenced next week.

Kelly is a strong and amazing lady who faced a nightmare of abuse but has come through it. All credit to domestic violence survivors who have made it through the abuse and controlling behaviour.

Kelly was not only beaten, but faced controlling behaviour, intimidation, threats, and called awful names all in a bid to stop her testifying. Yet she did and she won and not even the hiring of a murder trial lawyer was able to find the man not guilty.

Victims of domestic violence are amazing role models in our society. It can happen to anyone and to have the strength to come forward and face their abusers takes real courage.

Well done to you all who have been in this situation.